* Bush has joined #Dicktatorz

P_u_t[in] sets mode: +o Bush

* 5ark0 has joined #Dicktatorz

* kleanton has joined #Dicktatorz

<kleanton> Hey room!

<kleanton> What's up?

* kleanton was kicked by P_u_t[in] (Not allwed here anymore)

* kleanton has joined #Dicktatorz

<kleanton> Vlad

<kleanton> After all I did for you

P_u_t[in] sets mode: +b 66.178.211.29

<kleanton> You have no shame?

* kleanton was kicked by P_u_t[in] (Banned!)

* kim_jong66 has joined #Dicktatorz

<kim_jong66> yoyo people

<Bush> kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim!!!

<kim_jong66> yoyo

<Bush> WUZAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

<kim_jong66> WUZZAAAAAAAAAAAA

<Bush> WAAZAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

<kim_jong66> WUZAAAAAA

* Pervez_Paki has joined #Dicktatorz

<kim_jong66> wuzzzzaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Pervez!!

<Pervez_Paki> man, I didn't do it.

<Bush> wuzzaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!1

<Bush> do wat/

<Bush> do wHat??

<Bush> do what?

<Pervez_Paki> I didn't do it man, i didn't.

<5ark0> my country can offer you exil

<5ark0> you just have to say you did it

<5ark0> then you get exil

<Pervez_Paki> I don't want no exile

<Pervez_Paki> I want to win fair elections man!

<P_u_t[in]> Fair elections?

<5ark0> mdr

<5ark0> we all know you did it

* |4D3|\| has joined #Dicktatorz

P_u_t[in] sets mode: +o |4D3|\|

<Bush> WWWWWWWUUUUZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA BEN!!!!

<|4D3|\|> wazaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa......!!!

<Bush> WUZZAA!!

<kim_jong66> ben, you did it? was it you?

<|4D3|\|> LOL

<|4D3|\|> No no, this time waznt me. Thought it was perv?

<Pervez_Paki> I tell you man, it wasn't me!

<Pervez_Paki> I mean, man, like I gave three days for mourning and shit

<Pervez_Paki> Man, it wasn't me I fucking promise

<|4D3|\|> LOL

<|4D3|\|> thn who did it?

<Pervez_Paki> I thought it was you?

<|4D3|\|> no

<5ark0> exil, exil! Come to my place!!

<5ark0> I bought a PSP

<5ark0> I have GTA on it

<5ark0> gf LOVES it!

<Bush> 5ark0 has a hoooot gffffff!

<5ark0> Yehhh.. hehehe... she's beautiful, non?

* el`fid`el has joined #Dicktatorz

<Bush> Shes hotttttttttttt

<5ark0> Have you had any chance with rice?

<5ark0> You tried the thing I told you?

<kim_jong66> I LOVE EATING RICE!!! HAHAAHHAHA!!

<5ark0> It is a Francais thing, they love it

<Bush> :(

<Bush> NOOO

<Bush> SHE DIDNT!!

* Bush sniffs

* kim_jong66 has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)

<Pervez_Paki> Can we talk about my problem? I have a problem now

<Bush> resign1 resign! Pervez resign!

<5ark0> resignes, and I give you exil

<Bush> rezing!! Parvez is going to resign!

<P_u_t[in]> You need to be stronger than that. Cancel the elections.

* kim_jong66 has joined #Dicktatorz

<P_u_t[in]> wb, Kim.

<kim_jong66> sry, got disc

<5ark0> resign, parvez, you’re screwed.

<Pervez_Paki> Man, maybe I should put off the elections?

<`el`fid`el> hey guys

* ROBERT has joined #Dicktatorz

<`el`fid`el> whats up?

<P_u_t[in]> Perv, if you don’t get a hold now, you never will.

<P_u_t[in]> You will end up life Afghanistan

<|4D3|\|> hey hey! Whats rong wiz Afghanistan!?!?

<`el`fid`el> I heard the news

<|4D3|\|> its a cool place

<|4D3|\|> cept for ze heat

<|4D3|\|> but zen who cares

<|4D3|\|> im in massachusetts rite now

<P_u_t[in]> Afghanistan has no economy, duh.

* Bush sniffs

<`el`fid`el> I heard the news

<Bush> is it because of meeee?

<Pervez_Paki> pretty bad eh, Fidel?

<`el`fid`el> yes; couldn’t believe it.

<Pervez_Paki> JUST LIKE ME! I tell you, it’s a shock!

<`el`fid`el> oh... I didn’t know you liked the Miami Dolphins...

<Pervez_Paki> huh?

<ROBERT> HEY ROOM

<`el`fid`el> yeah, they lost to the New England Patriots...

<Pervez_Paki> wtf, Do you live in a cave, Fid?

<`el`fid`el> I dont understand...

<|4D3|\|> zey killed benazir. she wuz hot. Pwns :(

<Pervez_Paki> they got her man, they got Bhutto!

<`el`fid`el> but who’s benazir

<|4D3|\|> opposition leader

<`el`fid`el> what does opposition mean/

<`el`fid`el> ?

<Bush> Hey I know I know I know! I know who did it!

* kim_jong66 has quit IRC (Read error: Connection reset by peer)

<5ark0> you know who did this thing?

<Bush> I knowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!

<Pervez_Paki> who did it man? Who did?

<Bush> It was pervezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!

<Pervez_Paki> I tell you it wasn’t me!!!!

<Bush> It’s what they are sayingggggg!!

<Pervez_Paki> who?

<Bush> tHEM!

<Pervez_Paki> Them who man?

<Bush> CIAAAA!!

<P_u_t[in]> Pfff, leave it. I’ll talk to the KGB about this.

<5ark0> I thought the KGB was closed?

<P_u_t[in]> LOL

<Bush> it was Pervez.

<Pervez_Paki> it wasn’t me! Man, you’re such a dick!

<ROBERT> WHY DID YOU KILL HER PERVEZ?

<P_u_t[in]> Robert, no caps please.

<ROBERT> I CANT ITS STUCK

<ROBERT> I CAN ONLY TYPE IN CAPS

<Pervez_Paki> Im telling you it was not me! I swear!

<P_u_t[in]> Pfff, never mind.

<ROBERT> IM SORRY MNA

<ROBERT> *MAN

* kleanton has joined #Dicktatorz

<kleanton> you all suck cock!

* kleanton has left #Dicktatorz

* P_u_t[in] changes topic to 'Parvez did it.'

<Pervez_Paki> FUCK YOU VLADIMIR! I did not do it!

<Bush> HAHAHAHAHA LOLLLLLL

<Bush> LOLLLLLLL

Letting it out

Some people drink. Others fight. Some manage to measure the disastrous effects it has on their lives, and just let go. He was a special case: he had tried to forget, but some things just stick to your skin so much that they become a part of you.

The long walk he had taken to the designated place had not calmed him down. He still wanted to see the pain, the blood. Even if it wasn't by his own hands, he needed to see it - death in all its brutality and insanity. Somehow, he knew that would calm him down.

He was at the right place. He could feel it - and smell it. The closer he got, the more the smell of fear and death filled his nostrils. The smell of flesh freshly cut out and blood was simply unbearable, yet he walked on. This was a place most people would prefer to forget - it was one of those places you knew existed, but never cared to think about. Slaughter houses were cursed, and so were the people working there.

There were no guards, no security - absolutely nobody to ask him who he was. This was one of the few rare places ordinary people don't visit.

The smell outside was nothing compared to what was happening inside - the interior looked grotesquely clean, yet he felt that every inch of the place reeked of death. He finally found a man standing in a corner, with what looked like a sledgehammer. He didn't have much time to grasp his surroundings as the man, in an almost mechanical motion raised his weapon and brought it down with full force on a cow's head. There was a brutal thump, and the cow hit the ground. There was no blood - there was no visible pain. Yet, death had come so quickly... His eyes were open wide, expecting the brutal scene to cure him. Nothing happened.

A long and most painful "Moooooo" resonated throughout the building.

Obviously, the cow was still alive and struggling to live. The man completely disregarded this fact and walked back to a small chair and table, where a bottle of rum was majestically contemplating the entire scene.

The cow let out another painful sound - which the man seemed to completely ignore. He took a quick shot and went back to grab his slaughter weapon.

- "Wait!"

The man turned around, and saw him.

- "Whatcha want, kid?" The man said.

There was a silence, followed by another painful cry by the cow.

- "Let me do it. I want to do it."

Another pause followed, and a smile appeared at the corner of the man's lips.

- "Sure, you can have a try. Come on, come closer. Well well well, you're not properly dressed for the occasion, but 'sokay I guess. Come on boy, hold the hammer."

As his hand clutched the deadly weapon, he felt the true weight of death. He felt within the hammer the sadistic desires of that man - he truly saw how bad human beings could get.

- "Alright sonny, aim for its head. Bring it down with all the muscle in your arms. Go on, you can do it."

He lifted the hammer above his head. He looked at the cow, who couldn't understand what was going on. It had lived a miserable life: permanently sequestrated, it had been forced to give its milk to its human masters every single day. And now that it couldn't do that anymore - they wanted her dead. It was a miserable life, a miserable existence, and he really hoped that one day, human beings would stop being so selfish.

He turned around, and swung the sledgehammer hard on the man's head. It was quick, simple and murderously effective. The man's head exploded with bits and pieces of his brain flying about.

There was an immense satisfaction as he felt the frustration and anger leave him.

The Web Revolution

The larger part of you (visitors) are going to simply cruise the net, day after day, downloading updated browsers and appreciating the beauty of the web while tapping on the vast amounts of organized information available. For some of you, however, the web is a never-ending pain of cross-browser issues involving Javascript, CSS and dysfunctional Div Tags. If life wasn't already hard for you, the introduction of AJAX didn't help at all. Everyday, there are now new issues, new cross-browser problems to fix, and WebServices to deal with.

A good, modern website usually contains/requires the following:

• HTML (or XHTML - most of us have switched to XHTML nowadays)
• CSS (2.0. CSS 3.0 is coming out pretty soon)
• JavaScript (Call it JScript, JavaScript or ECMAScript - we're currently at the third version of the language. The fourth one is coming soon.)
• AJAX (Asynchronous JavaScript And XML)
• Server-side code (Whatever language you're familiar with - JSP, ASP. PHP, ASP.net)
• Database code (SQL queries, stored procs - that depends on your DB)
• Flash (With Actionscript 2.0)
• Accompanying WebServices for JavaScript and/or Flash.
  

If you're planning to go into Web Design, think twice. With every single day, the web design business is getting more and more specialized. You can't be a jack of all trades. I, for example, can work my way around most of the technologies required for a website, but I won't ever match with someone who has worked closely with JavaScript and AJAX. Nor do my CSS skills match those of a talented web designer.

The problem with the web is that it has been built upon HTML. Years and years have gone by, but the core has remained the same. To "improve" the browsing experience, layers and layers of new technologies have been constructed on top of sad little HTML pages to make the web what it is today. It's like trying to make a car made out of wood, and running on steam fly. The amazing thing is that it IS flying.

I personally think that it's time to introduce a new format. Something totally different. On the client side, (X)HTML, CSS and ECMAScript need to be unified. And new graphical capabilities need to be added to browsers (which would cut out the need for Flash), as well as support for direct server communication (for streaming), while allowing the code to "mutate" and change itself. And yeah, pop-ups need to be killed.

On the server side, one single type of code should be able to generate the business logic, the presentation layer, query databases and at the same time deal with direct client communications to provide painless streaming functionality.

That's it! We have our requirements. Let's hope the W3C takes note of this blog post, and starts another one of their committee to study this case.

This Web Revolution of mine might not happen now... but I have high hopes for humanity, and the internet.

My first chain letter!

Have you ever wondered where chain letters came from? Well, after receiving numerous chain letters, I decided to create my own. Here goes:

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! SOMEBODY THOUGHT OF YOU AND FORWARDED YOU THIS BEAUTIFUL CHAIN MAIL! YOU'RE IN LUCK, BASTARD. READ ON.

This chain letter is for real. Well, you might as well ask Jean-Luc Dominique Emmanuel Coccio A., resident of Cité Barkly, Mauritius. He received this email in his inbox on the 7th of December 2006. He didn't read it. That was mainly because the computer he had was a stolen one, and there was no fucking way he'd put an internet connection on it. So he couldn't read it. And that's when weird shit started happening.

On the 17th of December, a few days before Christmas, a mad donkey barged into his house and raped him.
And as everybody knows, mad donkeys attacks are pretty frequent in Cité Barkly. He thought it was just bad luck. He still didn't check his email. Well, he couldn't anyway. A few days later, seven donkeys barged into his house and gang raped him. Still, he thought that was just pure coincidence.
On the 22nd of December, Jean-Luc Dominique was arrested for possesion. His inmate was Dr. Miko, a famous Mauritian sadist. Jean was basically in jail, and he really wished he had bought the pirated copies of Prison Break.
On the 23rd of December, he learned that there was an unread email in his inbox. Unfortunately, due to a lack of facilities in Mauritian prisons, he couldn't do anything about it.
On the 25th of December, his inmate, Dr. Miko, castrated Jean-Luc.

That was the end of him, and his sexual life.

See? You MUST pass this email on. You NEED to. I'm sure you don't want to be raped by a mad donkey with a disproportionate penis, do you? I treasure my asshole's virginity as much as you do. Think twice.

Now comes the magic part of this email - the one that will bring you luck and all that shit:

*
***
*****
***
*

See? It's a diamond! With little stars!
Yay!!
...
Right, get on to pass this email. Now.

AND REMEMBER! THE MAD DONKEY'S WATCHING YOU. EVERYTIME YOU TAKE A PISS. EVERYTIME YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH. EVERYTIME YOU WATCH PORN. IT KNOWS. BEWARE, BITCHES.

Saying thanks to you, Ashwinee Ramchurn.

I wasn't the most popular kid back in school. And I'm not talking about high school. I was the king of nerds at high school (well, vice-king until some dude named Arvind left, heh). I'm talking about primary school here.

Primary school was hell for me. I was wearing those huge glasses - like, miniature TV sets right in front of my eyes. I wonder if that did me any good. I didn't have many friends at that time - just a few ones. But it wasn't hell because I was being bullied by the bad guys... or anything of the sort. It was hell because I was shy. And shit would incessantly happen to the shy guy who just wants to be invisible. And I'm talking about un-bloggeable shit. Man, primary school was hell.

Somehow, I managed to graduate first of my entire class. Which sent me to middle school (middle school and high school's the same stuff in here). And then shit stopped happening to me, and I started to gain some self-confidence.

But that's not the point. This whole story is about a girl. Her name's Ashwinee Ramchurn. I think I got the name right... I remember she moved to another school for some obscure reason. I wasn't really good buddies with her - she was just in my class. She wasn't the cute girl I had a crush on. She wasn't the school bully. Right now, I just... kind of remember her face really well. Her very serious face. I remember she was pretty good at Hindi. And at almost everything else.

Why her? Why are my memories of her so vivid? Why am I looking for her right now? That's funny actually. Okay, it's not funny. It's actually quite touching.

During the occasional shit that would occur to me, Ashwinee one day popped up, and offered me help. Somehow on that day, my lunch had fallen over and was lying sprawled across the classroom floor. And she just turned around, and offered me her lunch. She opened it up, and asked me if I would have it.

The genuine kindness that emanated from her - still a kid - at that very moment marked me. And until now, I haven't forgotten. I was shocked at that time... she was some kind of stranger to me - we had never really talked. But then, she was graciously offering me help without me asking... and... I guess that had never happened to me before. The authenticity of her gesture would probably remain unmatched by a stranger throughout my life.

I refused her lunch, mumbling something about it being okay. And until this day, I kinda regret I never really talked to her. When she changed school, I remember going back home and crying on my bed. I don't really know why. I guess I was sad. Well, kids cry when they're sad. It's funny though, when you're a kid, you are a slave to your emotions, even if you don't understand them yet.

It's been nearly five years since I started looking for her. And man, believe me, when it comes to finding someone on the internet, I'm pretty good at that. I followed most of the leads... but... nada. Nothing. From time to time, I visit social networking sites, hoping to meet her there. I'm not obsessed or anything... (well, maybe I am due to the fact that I can't find someone I'm looking for) but I just want to meet her once again. Just for a few minutes. And find out about the person she became.

And then say "thank you."
Because I think I forgot to do that back in primary school.

It's weird, how stuff from your early years can affect you.
Very weird.